i've decided.

i want to see the world before i commit to a college or a career. despite how cliche it is, i'm going to backpack through this world.

my goal is to visit these places:

1. Chile
2. Brazil ( the rainforest!)
3. Equador
4. France
5. Prague
6. Italy
7. Greece
8. Germany
9. switzerland
10. Amsterdam ;)


& much more. i don't think my family will like it. but my brother taught me that i really should just do it, if it's what i want. & it's what i want.

i want someone provacative & talkative...

but it's so hard when your shallow as a shower

omg, today made me realize how much i want a boyfriend. like cereally, all because of this really cute guy at GSA, ( if you know who i'm talking about, back off, because he's all Sean's), well anywhoo, this encounter with this cutee just made me uberly want a boyfriend

too bad i only attract fugly boys, & i'm shallow as fuck

much love

last night.

last night i had the most awkward dream. i dont think i'm going to tell anyone about it ever. i just had to let it out. ( not the ACTUAL dream) They say dreams are a reflection of your innermost desires, but i can't want what i dreamed about! it says too much. i'm so confused & i can't talk about it to anyone. I'm so confused. ugh ASDFGHJKL! i can't believe i dreamed about "this" while i was sleeping in the same room as my mother & sister. ohhhgee. i'm so so confused. all i can say about the dream is that is has something to do with my sexual orientation. like i wasn't confused enough already. i'm probably looking to into this dream but idk, it was quite awkward & confusing and inappropriate.

maybe one day i should be a therapist. so i can find out wtf is wrong with me.

smell that?

it smells like a champion. hahaha, it's me! i won city! wooohoo! snaps for rebecca. dropped 6 seconds & dominated the 50 breast. whoooo so happy. then got free carl's jr. paid for by ms. hill. so many funny moments today. here's a few highlights as best i remember

1. i won city! for my 50 breast. :D

2. taking a zillion pictures of myself & others.

3. ALL Megan's races. she's such a dominator. 

4. ooh la la, a new SmackitlikeBeccum video

5. Got to wear my parka <3

6. i saw coach run! hahaha, 

7. I saw Kate<3>

8. Araceli's chocolate, which made me & sean uber happy (: 

9." There's ALWAYS room for dessert."  & tubs of icecream with like 6 spoons.

10. Did i mention i won city? 

oooooh dang. so happy. all i can say is i love my coaches. i love the family. i love my best/juicebox, & i love love love the swim team. thats all. 

best wishes, & mucho lovve<3

Today.

Today is city finals. ohhh emmm geeee. nervousness!

prop 8 was upheld

The supreme court decided to uphold prop 8. which seriously seriously seriously sucks. i'm pretty pissed and extremely disgusted with the supreme court and all those people who support prop 8. i'll probably write another blog when i'm not as angry.

all i'll say right now is this. How can i get married, have kids, and be hapy with my life if my best friend will not be allowed to do the same things with whatever guy he wants. asdfghjk!

day of decision.

i find myself not sleepy. i want it to be tomorrow already so i can know if prop 8 gets repealed. I hope I hope I hope I hope I hope I hope it does. It's really terrible that it got passed in the first place. i think of my best friend sean, and my "uncles" javier & anothony and all the kids in GSA and it makes me terribly sad that they have to fight for the rights that me & other hetero people were born with. i don't uderstand why people are so against gay marriage. no one has been able to give me a valid reason to oppose it. RELIGION? not everyone has the same religion, so not everyone should be subjected to the rules of any religion. and as far as religion goes, the greatest gift god has given his people is free will. and people deserve the right to express their free will by getting married to whomever they choose. it really comes down to that. FREE WILL. america is about freedom right? so everyone, including gay people, should be able to have the freedom to marry whoever they choose.

that's the way i see it. there's a billion reasons gay marriage should be allowed but i have yet to hear any valid reason why it shouldnt be allowed. so i really really hope it gets repealed.

if it doesn't then people like me and my school's GSA will keep fighting the endless battle for equality. Marriage is only the beginning, there's much more to be done.

Tomorrow is the day of decision. lets hope the right one is made.

Socialvibe for America <3

Memorial Day

it's quite sad that no one really acknowledges this holiday. Not to say i do. i am totally guilty of overlooking this holiday too. it's just an extra day off practice, an excuse to "take the day off". but truly when i start to think about it this day, memorial day, it makes me sad. so many lives have been taken, affected, or altered because of the war. it sucks, truly sucks. So i shall dedicate my post today to all those who have died becuase of the war and their grieving families. Today i will remember them, honor them, and thank them for the duty they fufilled to their country.

Here's to them <3