Happy Thanksgiving! <3

I wish everyone the happiest of thanksgivings. I hope everyone has a great day and eats lots of good food. <3

The following is a list of people i'm thankful for. These people truly make me happy to be alive, and i am totally blessed with everything. If i were to count my blessings, i'd be the first person to count to infinity. Its true. No joke. They make me feel infinite. anyways... here's the list :)

I'm thankful for:

My wonderful, messed up, crazy ass, family. For being the stability and instabilty in life. For us always sticking together through all our troubles, for making me the person i am today. and for forgiving me for all my faults, and understanding my difficulties. I am so thankful for you all. Victoria and Alex, you two are the best siblings in the world. I'm sorry i'm not a better sister to you, and i'm thankful you don't mind my phsyco-ness in the slightest. I'm so blessed to have you guys in my past, present, and future. My mother, your the best mother in the world. I just can't even describe with words how much i love you. You know. My grandparents, i'm thankful i grew up with you two. It's shaped me to be the good person i am more than anything else. The reason i try to be good and do good is all for you. Thank you family for being exactly what i need in life. I love you all <3

My rainbow of Friends ( in no particular order):

*Carmine Aiello, I'm so thankful that i went to thailand, because it solidifyed my friendship with you. We were just friends before we went and now coming back your defineately one of my closest girlfriends. I am so thankful and blessed to have you as a friend. Your someone i can tell anything, absolutely anything, and you won't judge me at all and your opinion of me won't change. Thats a beautiful thing. Your friensship came so quickly and unexpectadly at the time i needed it the most, & i'll always appreciate that.I'm so grateful for you, and i know that we're going to be friends for a long time.You truly are like a sister to me. I love you, you whore. <3 lol
*Chad Jariya, i honestly can't even begin to express what you mean to me. Thailand was so worth it, just for the fact that i met you. I'm so thankful to have you in my life now. Your like an older brother, i can tell you any of my problems and you'll never feel burdened by them. Thank you for not treating me and carmine like children, and talking to us like equals.You make me feel loved and i value your words and opinions more than most people.I'll always make the choice to stay up until like 3 in the morning even if i have to get up at 6, if your online, just to talk to you. I love you, my thai hooker <3 !
*Eric Carjan, your honestly the cutest, purest, and easiest friendship i have. I love you so much, its insane. Your like a younger brother to me and i am thankful to have your untainted youth in my life. Your laugh is one of my favorite things in the world, and i can't wait to be your friend/sister as you grow up.If i'm ever hard on you, or too motherly, or overbearing, only know its because i love you. I need you in my life, as much as you need me. You should know your stuck with me forever, so get used to it! LOL, but seriously, your just awesome. I love you baby boy! <3

[ for the above people, i truly can't wait till we're reunited next year. You three are truly like a second family, along w/ Kanjana and Mrs. Carjan, who i am also immensely thankful for. Love you people! )

*Sean Mack , where to begin, where to begin. I hope you know how much i care for you boy. Your one of the few people who actually sort of listen to me when i talk, despite how annoying and squeaky i get. You always call out my bullshit, and i can trust you to be honest with me. You give the best hugs and can always make me smile when i really don't feel like it. Your presence gives me strength because your one of the strongest people i know, besides victoria. Thanks for being there for me. I'm so thankful to have you in my life, eventhough our time together is limited. I love you Link ! <3
*Melissa Duenas, to this day, i can honestly say that i've never met anyone who's inner beauty or outer beauty even comes close to comparing to you. You just give of the most wonderful vibe in the world, and whenever i hangout with you i truly feel happy.You make me laugh and i'm glad i have so many of our funny moments to remember. Your just someone who brings out the best in me, and for that i am so thankful. Your going to be famous one day, i know you are. You've always been a star to me, and its time the world sees it to. Just know that i'm always here for you, ALWAYS.Dont forget that, superstar. Love you melisha, you'll always be the penguin to my duck.<3
*Daisy Garcia, you girl are just fantastic. I love that i can just be a total bitch to you and with you. You always know how to make me laugh and are like someone i can really easily talk to. I love how your blunt, and honest and a little bit mean. It just refreshing to have someone so real in my life. Eventhough your a skankbasket, at least you know it and embrace it! More people should be like you. You also are the hottest mofo i know. Geez girl, seriously. LOL, anyways thanks for just being daisy. Because thats what i need. Love you poodle! <3
*Kimberly Figuracion, I'm so happy to know you. its as simple as that. Your gorgeous, athletic, funny, and smart. Your just fabulous.I love that i can talk to you, and not feel awkward. It amazing we've stayed friends, eventhough we're so closebutsofar! It just helps me keep the hope alive that i will be blessed enough to have you in my life for a long time.With you my self-esteem is at an all time low.For you kimmie, i'll always have all time love. <3
*Dulce Ochoa, your seriously the fiercest lady in the world. I admire your attitude, your divaness, and your faith. I love how your just as loud and crazy as i am. But your also such a sweet and loyal friend. I'm glad even though, your all the way in texas, we've stayed close. You'll always be in my thought and one of my closest friends. I love you, you crazy ass texan! <3
*Daisy Chan & Bryan Luong, for making school bearable, and helping me handle the little dramas of everyday life. For being just as nerdy and dorky as i am, from playing pokemon pictionary to casting spells from harry potter. We truly are nerds, but the 3 of us together make it not so lame. I'd search for narnia with you guys anytime, anyday, I love you two <3.
* Darcy Cotto, you make me smile so much it makes my face heart. We're equally retarded and that makes me smile. Everytime i see a gummy i think of you. I really love the way you dress, the way you look, and just everything about you. David is a really lucky boy<3. I'm thanfkul when i decide not to go to the dance in 7th grade because if i had gone, i probably wouldnt have you in my life today.haha, I love you, my honey bunches of oats<3
*Michelle Menechyan, you sexy, sexy,sexy, girl. I freakin love you. Seriously, girl. I love the fact that i can lift you up and spin you around and i love that you love when i do it. I love how you take my advice, and value my opinion. I love all our innuendo and sexual remarks. It makes me giggle. Your.Just.So.Spectacular. i dont even know words to tell you that i love you. I'm so thankful to have your gorgus spirit in my life. I love you, sexythang! <3

I'm also thankful for : Benjamin Luong, Joseph Lee, Annie Gov, Connie Ruan, and the rest of my school friends. And the swim team.

I'm thankful for everything really. I'm so so so so blessed. <3 i'm thankful for everyone and everything in my life. There's honestly too many to say. But i love you all, and hope you had a great thankgsgiving <3

yeah, i've always been a bad photographer.

DAISY AND REBECCA! <3 8th grade. i fuckin love us.
this photo seemed cute at the time. but it's kinda tooo ehh.
lol. she got me the ducky & the bracelet. she's the poodle to my duck!

swimming, memories, contentness, friends, etc.

Had a refreshing day today. I'm so glad i decided to go. eventhough i was alone the whole day. i gave myself an hour and a half workout. which in itself was fantastic. i forgot how much i love cold water. After that i got my book out and just layed on the pool deck reading/napping/tanning. it was fabulous. no one talked to me the entire time, no one payed me any notice. i was alone. & i was ok.

This time alone was a very good time for some self-reflection. usually i hate being alone but today was so different. it was undescribable . but i came out from the pool so realxed & at peace with the world. i feel changed & exactly the same at the same time. I dont even know. words fail me.

Through this I realized that all my most memorable moments with my friends or in life in general have been when we weren't really doing anything. it wasnt the times i went to parties, or went out, or got wasted, it wasnt the times when i had the most fun or was the happiest. it was the moments When i was just having a quiet moment or a small conversation with someone, just time where things seemed quiet & simple and i was completely content.

Then i realized that the people i've had these moments with are the ones i'm the closest to. which of course make the moments more special. like with my Friend dulce one of my favorite memories is when we were eating grilled cheese sandwhiches & watching spongebob. with melissa the best was( and still is) everytime i'd go to her house and we just relaxed watching tv. my best moment with Daisy was when we used to lay on the turf at irving and watch the clouds go by. my new fave with kim is when is going to the park/her house with her & just talking about anything & everything. My favorite times with darcy was counting pennies & nickels to have enough to buy 35 cent sodas from el ranchito & her hugs. with sean my favorite times are the times when we just got to cuddle after practice and our long all over the place convos. see? simple,stupid, irrelevant moments that only i remember or treasure. I LOVE MY FRIENDS. they're simply amazing.

but yeah, moment like those make life worth it. along with all the ourtageously fun & happy moments. i need to be alone more often ( but not too often!) it lets me appreaciate things more.

because i'm bored & i dislike myspace.

so i'm doing a myspace survey here! ( what a lame-o!)
haha, i think this is like a "friend" survey or something, but here it goes. answers are in bold!


Is there somebody in your life that you could not survive without?
yes many people actually.

How many close friends do you have?
ummm, i would say about 6 or 7

Who is the most beautiful person you know?
Melissa Nichole <3 inside&out

Most annoying?
probably my sister.

Who in your life has hurt you the most?
my family. my friends(unintentionaly), but mostly i hurt myself

Is the someone you know you should hate, but you cant?
no, i shouldnt hate anyone, no one should

Do you like someone as more than a friend right now?
ummm, yes. i love people as best friends haha

What went wrong in your last relationship?
i got bored, like i always do.

Do you miss anybody?
i miss multiple people, more than i can say

Have you ever lost anybody close to you?
no. thankgod

Is there anyone you trust even though you should not?
no, i pretty much trust everyone

Who knows you best?
i honestly don't know. i think all my friend know a different part of myself really well, but none know all of me.

Ever given your all to someone who walked away?
no. i've never been into someone like that

Relationship or Hook-Up?
it depends on the person

Ever been in love with someone?
not that kind of love

Need anyone?
my best friends.( all of them)

Few close friends or many acquaintances?
a mixture of both

Has anybody in your family ever let you down?
yes, many many times

Anybody in your friends ever let you down?
yes, also many many times

Who have you let down the most?
probably my family, more specifically my mother

Who is your best friend of the same sex?
i have quite a few: Melissa, Daisy, Dulce, & Kimmie, ohh & to a lesser degree daisy(chan) and darcy

Best friend of the opposite sex?
sean (:

Ever kissed someone you regretted after?
yes, story of my (love) life

Ever told a member of the opposite sex you loved them?
yes, & i always mean it, just not in that way

Ever had your heart broken?
no, i'm never invested enough in my relationships to have been broken hearted

Ever broken somebody elses?
unfortunatley yes.

Who do you know is the most ambitious?
melissa, but i know she's going to be famous one day<3

Who is the most frustrating?
my sister, daisy, & sometimes sean

Who is the loudest?
dulce! but i lovve her loudness

Who is the quietest?
daisy chan. quiet & sarcastic, love it<3

Who is the most genuine?
hmmm, honestly i don't know.

Who has the power to make your world fall apart?
any of my friends or family

Ever love someone that wasnt good for you?
nope, all love is good love

Wanna say something to someone?
nothing comes to mind at the moment

Wish things could have gone differently with someone?
yes, but not for reasons you might think

Hows your heart lately?
beating